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 D/s, D&S, Ds = DOMINANCE & SUBMISSION

This is the most comprehensive term for the world of
fetish play, though it does miss a few individual categories:
some fetish acts do not assign a top or bottom role.

B/D, B&D, BD = BONDAGE & DISCIPLINE

This refers to play of physical restraint plus application of
physical or mental stimulation or duress. BONDAGE and
DISCIPLINE can be separate! Don't use the term BD and
lump them together unless you do mean both.


S/M, S&M, SM = SADOMASOCHISM

Original meaning: a person interested in application
of pain, or receipt of pain.
The term then widened to refer to play which stimulates
the senses in any unusual way.
This stage also saw the term sometimes being called Sex Magic.
The term is now being loosely applied to all players and
fetishists, which I think is an unfair overgeneralization.
(I've seen SM writers lump all sexual variations as "SM".
For a basic foot fetishist, it is erasure to be labeled
as an SM player.)
However, the culture trend right now is making "SM" the
umbrella term. I've noticed it's mostly actual SM players
who are pushing this label to cover all types of
players and fetishists.

BDSM = all of the above

An umbrella term that is growing in popularity.
 Unfortunately, it doesn't exactly include pure object fetishists.

FETISHIST

A person who regards an object or body part as sexual.
Psychology's hard line states that a true fetishist is one who
can't achieve sexual gratification unless they involve
their fetish -- but psychologistsseem to only meet
that .0005%; most of the fetishists I've known werealso
able to enjoy themselves without involving
their fetish every time.

DOMINANT, MASTER, TOP, CAPTOR, ACTIVE PLAYER  SUBMISSIVE, SLAVE,

 BOTTOM, CAPTIVE, PASSIVE PLAYER

There are many related terms for the complementary
roles of D/s. Taken narrowly, these terms usually refer to
the role or actions engaged in DURING PLAY; most people
do not behave submissively or dominantly 24 hours a day.
No one term covers all people satisfactorily, and in particular,
many of these labels translate poorly for bondage players.
For example, if Jon pretends to be a burglar and he grabs
and ties she up, he would be taking a dominant role,
but if I resist and enjoy struggling against him,
She´s  not really being "submissive."

Master & slave (Mistress & slave).

 Roles. Each person takes on a fantasy of sexual identity.
This is usually temporary and only lasts as long as the scene does.
There are very few people who stay in these roles all the time.


Top & bottom.

Noun and/or verb. This refers to activities more than roles,
since some people like to do D/s actions without
assumption of roles or one person playing submission.
The Top is the person administering the scene, the
bottom receives it. The terms do not literally mean being
on top or lying on the bottom, nor having things done to a butt. However, the term sounds confusing in spanking, because
the bottom is indeed getting things done to his/her bottom.
Used as verbs: "I would like to top you.
Do you like to bottom?"

Captor & captive

You'll rarely see these terms used except in the bondage sub-culture.

"Captive" is a particularly useful term for

bondagers because it encompasses scenes where the
bottom is not submissive, they are resisting or playing a non-compliant role. Some players use the word victim
instead; the only reason I use that less frequently is,
in mainstream culture it describes someone who has
actually been harmed by a power-loss experience.

Active & passive.

 Verb. Very general terms for play, and can be occasionally
used if you're not sure whether someone considers
themselves a top, or a dominant. Still, exceptions blur
these terms. In most play, the active person is the top,
but there are also scenes where the bottom is the one
being physically active, such as a servant bringing
things to the Mistress.

TOPPING FROM THE BOTTOM

A philosophically and sociologically loaded term, usually
meant to be a negative label. Narrowly speaking, it's a
bottom who is disrupting the scene by trying to over-
control the top. However, some tops take this to mean
that bottoms should just shut up and put up with
whatever happens. A bottom should be able, at any
time, to negotiate the scene, re-negotiate the scene,
or volunteer information if something is going wrong.
Beyond that, there is a range of play styles; some tops
like you to tell them what you like all the way
through the scene.

CAPITALIZATION


There is a convention in the D/s Scene that Tops --
both roles and names -- begin with a capital letter,
and bottoms -- both roles and names -- begin with a lower
case letter. In the most casual form, this would translate to,
"Hello, my name is Ms Divine and this is my slave tim."
The most formal players would write this as
"Hello, My name is Carla, and this is My slave Martin"
You don't have to follow this convention for your own
name, role, or writings unless you wish to. The general
etiquette is to address people the way they like to be
addressed. This doesn't mean, however, that you must call
a stranger "Master Charles" when you're not his own sub.

SAFEWORD


A word, sound or motion that communicates a need
to change something in the scene. A safeword is not exactly
needed if you're playing a scene sans role, because in that
context you can just tell the partner what they need to know. However, if you're going into role and don't want to leave
role to discuss adjustments, or if you'll be gagged and can't communicate clearly, decide on a safeword (or several) before beginning a scene. Common safewords are "red" and
the word "safeword."
People use safewords differently. For some, the use of
a safeword means "stop the scene immediately."
For others, it simply means something needs adjustment.
Be sure you let other players know what they should do
if a safeword is used.

PLAYER


A person who participates in a scene, scenes, or fetish activities.

DRESSER


A person who likes dressing in fetish wear or leather,
and might be mistaken for a player, but their actual
fetish is the dressing. Don't take

 
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